Dreams come true.

It was my dream,
To have you.
And now you grow everyday,
My dream came true.

And now…..I cant wait to meet you.

Xx

38 weeks - baby still in there!

Just had a nice hot bath and had a chat to lily. Letting her know whenever shes ready I am ready :)
I told her I can't wait to meet her and of course everyone else is excited too! Like her granny and grandpa (my parents) and her uncles and her daddy and her aunty loz and uncle jimmy! and when i mentioned my uncle and the page family i had this feeling of that she has met them before. it was super awesome. I love talking to her, shes my favourite everything :)
I honestly can't wait to meet her :)

Pregnancy is hard! :)

No matter how uncomfortable i am, the fact i get up 1000x to pee , my hips feel like chicken wishbones being pulled apart, i have a mad waddle going on, i have to huff and puff to do everything or how many times i just want it over.
I also feel so blessed that I have the ability to carry a child, i think how incredible this body of mine is, how incredible my bond has grown with my fiancé, how much it has changed us for the better, how amazing the reward will be and i forget all the shitty stuff, to me none of that matters.
I want to cherish every elbow jab, every hiccup, every squirm my baby does, because very soon I wont feel it anymore and what a special experience it is :) I’m bonding with my baby everyday, how beautiful :)

(For my) Parents.

You brought me into this world,
taught me everything I needed to know to survive.
It's amazing how close I feel to you,
That feeling, where you don't have to pretend,
that I feel so often with others.
Just being myself,
the highs and lows no longer matter,
you are proud of them both.
that for me is the best feeling in the world.

Your strength keeps me going,
and your words are my strength.
Your positive nature keeps me grounded,
and your energy is my thriving force.
Your nurture helps me grow,
and your hugs are my home.

You are the significant part of my life.
You shaped me, with allowing me to stray,
constant support, without asserting control.
Your guidance was second to none, and I am so thankful,
and now we have a closeness, that I'd only dreamed about.

Thankyou for your unconditional love xx

32 weeks - heading into 33 weeks!

This weekend my parents came over. Kane was working for 3 days straight over it so we just hung out. Thursday arvo they came over and I showed them what I had so far for the baby and they had brought over the change table and some other gifts I received at the baby shower. Dad put the  bouncer I got from my Aunty Wen together.  He also put the change table together and we went shopping. We ended up buying lots for the baby and me it was awesome I love my parents so much! We are so spoilt!

Just some photos from the weekend :)

31 weeks!

31 weeks tomorrow. These weeks are going quicker and quicker!
It blows my mind.
This week baby is the size of a pineapple.
I found something and edited it- to describe how we feel

---
Tied down. What an interesting metaphor. I told them we didn’t see it that way. Our child will not be rope to bind us, or a rock to weigh us down. This is lightness, release, liberty. Through this experience we've already felt a new found love, sharing life, inspiring and being inspired. Every day from the beginning has been a celebration, every moment a delight.

No one is the right age to be tied down. Humans are designed to be free. Are we too young to fly a kite, to float on clouds, to ride a magic carpet? Are we too young to laugh, to sing songs, to be in awe, to understand the truth as only a child can reveal it? No way. Life is too magical living inside our imaginations.

We’ve both experienced tied down, and this is the opposite. This is the amazement of life and we are proud to whatever has to come in the future.
---

tutors/lectuers who do my head in.

After 3 years at uni, I don't know if it's just social work tutors/lecturers, but I am SO sick of the odd tutor/lecturer who thinks we don't have a life outside of uni. The ones who expect you'll go to every single class no matter what (sometimes completely impossible) and really play the guilt trip when you can't make it, or don't even want to hear an excuse, they have already assumed you're just slack.

They are always the ones who don't like granting extensions, why have extensions if you don't want to grant any, EVER?

They always try to exert their power energetically to make you feel like you're never doing good enough, and yes THIS MAY work for some people (not actually sure who) it actually offers the complete opposite effect for me. It does not empower me, it does not make me want to go to class more, it does not make me feel positive, it makes me want to not go, to drop out and to never return because you make me feel so uncomfortable EVERY single class (and I am never the only one!)

Your words are contradictory and when the whole class feels the same way, you're not doing it right. You're there to teach, not be our mothers and boss us around or make us feel like we're not doing good enough, I'm pretty sure every single student is already self talking themselves with that nonsense!

The hardest part is I can see through the act and I can't say anything because if I did you'd just rationalise it to yourself and I'd be the one full of shit. I've seen your type too many times!

I have one of these this year, she was really rude to a girl whose Nan had died and she wanted an extension saying it's not a 'good enough excuse'. WOW just wow. How can someone teach about empathy? How can someone say not to exert power and work with narrative therapy? How can someone talk about engaging and LISTENING skills when they treat people like this?

She is the only tutor I haven't told I'm pregnant, because I feel so uncomfortable. Considering I've felt comfortable telling the other tutors plus students, I doubt it's just me feeling anxious.

You remind me of that psycho lecturer who rang my mobile one day just to tell me it was 'against university policy to walk out of a lecture' because I found her lecture to be completely useless and she was being nasty to students who asked questions. I realised I was being bullied and told another tutor, who told me no-one liked her - even the teaching staff and she'd be losing her 'internal' position next semester. HOW do these kinds of people get into educating ANYONE?

In a perfect world, these lecturers and tutors would understand the world does NOT revolve around just THEIR class and we have 1. Other things to do in our life, 2. Other subjects to study and write assignments for/attend and 3. We are not ALL making up excuses for extensions or days we can't attend, most of the time it's legit.